1 00:00:04,519 --> 00:00:08,840 James just sent this one to me today. 2 00:00:08,840 --> 00:00:15,839 And I almost deleted it. 3 00:00:15,839 --> 00:00:17,239 But you know, as I went out, 4 00:00:17,239 --> 00:00:19,809 I go over to Brackenridge to pray 5 00:00:19,809 --> 00:00:21,759 and I couldn't get away from it, 6 00:00:21,759 --> 00:00:24,075 so I thought you know what, 7 00:00:24,075 --> 00:00:32,379 I'm going to visit it. 8 00:00:32,379 --> 00:00:34,426 "I'm single. 9 00:00:34,426 --> 00:00:35,940 In your video: 10 00:00:35,940 --> 00:00:38,899 'Important to Walk in Purity Before Marriage,' 11 00:00:38,899 --> 00:00:41,019 you mention that in 1 Corinthians 7 12 00:00:41,019 --> 00:00:45,758 that those who lack self-control should marry. 13 00:00:45,758 --> 00:00:47,448 What about Christians for whom 14 00:00:47,448 --> 00:00:50,218 there are no prospects in sight? 15 00:00:50,218 --> 00:00:51,939 Especially as a woman 16 00:00:51,939 --> 00:00:54,377 waiting for someone to pursue you 17 00:00:54,377 --> 00:00:56,609 is frustrating to the point of tears 18 00:00:56,609 --> 00:00:58,457 and heartbreaking. 19 00:00:58,457 --> 00:01:00,416 You say "get married" 20 00:01:00,416 --> 00:01:03,837 like it's something we can just get up and do." 21 00:01:03,837 --> 00:01:08,828 Well, I don't want to be insensitive to this, 22 00:01:08,828 --> 00:01:12,359 but I do want to point out this: 23 00:01:12,359 --> 00:01:14,977 "You say, 'get married,' 24 00:01:14,977 --> 00:01:19,587 like it's something you can just get up and do." 25 00:01:19,587 --> 00:01:23,158 It's not me that says it. 26 00:01:23,158 --> 00:01:27,527 Paul says it. 27 00:01:27,527 --> 00:01:37,439 Let's look at it. 1 Corinthians 7. 28 00:01:37,439 --> 00:01:49,809 1 Corinthians 7:8-9 29 00:01:49,809 --> 00:01:51,657 "To the unmarried and the widows, 30 00:01:51,657 --> 00:01:53,359 I say that it is good for them 31 00:01:53,359 --> 00:01:55,048 to remain single as I am, 32 00:01:55,048 --> 00:01:58,140 but if they cannot exercise self-control, 33 00:01:58,140 --> 00:02:00,478 they should marry. 34 00:02:00,478 --> 00:02:04,818 For it's better to marry than to burn with passion." 35 00:02:04,818 --> 00:02:08,019 This is typical. 36 00:02:08,019 --> 00:02:12,399 It's typical that people say 37 00:02:12,399 --> 00:02:14,307 to the preacher or teacher, 38 00:02:14,307 --> 00:02:15,959 "you say," 39 00:02:15,959 --> 00:02:17,819 but what's important 40 00:02:17,819 --> 00:02:19,988 is that we really listen 41 00:02:19,988 --> 00:02:23,507 and we be Berean and ask ourselves this: 42 00:02:23,507 --> 00:02:26,379 Does Scripture say it? 43 00:02:26,379 --> 00:02:29,833 You see, Paul is the one saying here 44 00:02:29,833 --> 00:02:32,218 get married. 45 00:02:32,218 --> 00:02:34,619 But anyway, that's just a side note. 46 00:02:34,619 --> 00:02:36,718 Let's keep going. 47 00:02:36,718 --> 00:02:38,819 "You say, 'get married,' like it's something 48 00:02:38,819 --> 00:02:40,408 that we can just get up and do, 49 00:02:40,408 --> 00:02:42,450 and it's rarely that simple. 50 00:02:42,450 --> 00:02:44,637 Sometimes it seems married people 51 00:02:44,637 --> 00:02:47,019 are flippant and insensitive 52 00:02:47,019 --> 00:02:48,406 towards single people 53 00:02:48,406 --> 00:02:52,449 telling them to just be content." 54 00:02:52,449 --> 00:02:57,179 Which she realizes is not untrue. 55 00:02:57,179 --> 00:02:59,688 "And I don't think that married people 56 00:02:59,688 --> 00:03:02,666 remember how fierce the battle is with purity 57 00:03:02,666 --> 00:03:04,408 when they were single. 58 00:03:04,408 --> 00:03:05,788 It's very frustrating. 59 00:03:05,788 --> 00:03:08,837 You said yourself you longed to be married 60 00:03:08,837 --> 00:03:11,659 but the Lord kept you single for 3 years 61 00:03:11,659 --> 00:03:13,908 and that was not enjoyable. 62 00:03:13,908 --> 00:03:15,338 You longed to be married. 63 00:03:15,338 --> 00:03:17,764 Is there a practical side to getting married? 64 00:03:17,764 --> 00:03:20,549 Also, should churches help singles get married 65 00:03:20,549 --> 00:03:23,699 and if so, what can churches do?" 66 00:03:23,699 --> 00:03:33,198 Now look, I am not being sarcastic 67 00:03:33,198 --> 00:03:34,988 when I say some of the things 68 00:03:34,988 --> 00:03:36,388 that I'm about to say. 69 00:03:36,388 --> 00:03:43,248 This is not sarcasm. 70 00:03:43,248 --> 00:03:46,867 What are the options? 71 00:03:46,867 --> 00:03:49,429 I mean, let's seriously ask that question. 72 00:03:49,429 --> 00:03:52,689 If you have a young lady or a young man, 73 00:03:52,689 --> 00:03:56,697 they want to be married, but they're single, 74 00:03:56,697 --> 00:04:00,750 what are the options? 75 00:04:00,750 --> 00:04:03,717 I just went riding 76 00:04:03,717 --> 00:04:06,997 with three brothers from the church - 77 00:04:06,997 --> 00:04:12,358 went on a bike ride before the Bible study 78 00:04:12,358 --> 00:04:15,389 and I typically do that on Tuesday's. 79 00:04:15,389 --> 00:04:19,468 And oftentimes, Craig asks me 80 00:04:19,468 --> 00:04:22,037 what are the questions you're dealing with tonight. 81 00:04:22,037 --> 00:04:23,718 And I'll tell him. 82 00:04:23,718 --> 00:04:27,218 And I told the guys - I told he and Carlos 83 00:04:27,218 --> 00:04:31,067 that I wanted to deal with this question. 84 00:04:31,067 --> 00:04:35,798 And I said I've got like 12 options. 85 00:04:35,798 --> 00:04:43,297 And I said the first option is: 86 00:04:43,297 --> 00:04:45,618 you can go to a bar, you can get drunk, 87 00:04:45,618 --> 00:04:48,235 you can go home with a guy. 88 00:04:48,235 --> 00:04:51,467 And I told the guys I'm not being sarcastic, 89 00:04:51,467 --> 00:04:53,228 and Carlos goes, 90 00:04:53,228 --> 00:04:58,467 "No. There's a lot of people who choose that." 91 00:04:58,467 --> 00:04:59,819 That's absolutely true. 92 00:04:59,819 --> 00:05:01,888 That's not sarcasm. 93 00:05:01,888 --> 00:05:03,408 (incomplete thought) 94 00:05:03,408 --> 00:05:05,828 Look, what I want to do right now 95 00:05:05,828 --> 00:05:07,877 is give options. 96 00:05:07,877 --> 00:05:10,108 And I'm not necessarily going to tell you 97 00:05:10,108 --> 00:05:13,759 whether these options are right or wrong. 98 00:05:13,759 --> 00:05:15,538 I'm just going to tell you 99 00:05:15,538 --> 00:05:17,097 what are the options. 100 00:05:17,097 --> 00:05:19,118 What are the options if you find yourself 101 00:05:19,118 --> 00:05:21,347 in a single state 102 00:05:21,347 --> 00:05:25,997 and you're struggling with being there? 103 00:05:25,997 --> 00:05:28,001 I'm not saying that some of these options 104 00:05:28,001 --> 00:05:29,939 are options to choose or not choose. 105 00:05:29,939 --> 00:05:31,849 Some of them may be marginal. 106 00:05:31,849 --> 00:05:33,678 Some of you may think 107 00:05:33,678 --> 00:05:35,238 well, yeah, you could do that; 108 00:05:35,238 --> 00:05:36,467 or some of you may think, 109 00:05:36,467 --> 00:05:38,918 well, that's inappropriate. 110 00:05:38,918 --> 00:05:42,598 I'm not really here to be your conscience. 111 00:05:42,598 --> 00:05:47,068 I know some things are wrong. 112 00:05:47,068 --> 00:05:48,626 They're obviously wrong. 113 00:05:48,626 --> 00:05:50,728 Some things are obviously right. 114 00:05:50,728 --> 00:05:58,407 Some things are in the grey matter. 115 00:05:58,407 --> 00:06:00,348 Some of you may have certain thoughts 116 00:06:00,348 --> 00:06:01,648 and some may have others. 117 00:06:01,648 --> 00:06:03,669 But what are the options? 118 00:06:03,669 --> 00:06:09,739 You find yourself sexually frustrated 119 00:06:09,739 --> 00:06:16,398 and/or intently lonely, 120 00:06:16,398 --> 00:06:20,338 and you don't like being single. 121 00:06:20,338 --> 00:06:26,697 So what do you do? 122 00:06:26,697 --> 00:06:31,559 (unintelligible) 123 00:06:31,559 --> 00:06:35,948 Well, like I say, 124 00:06:35,948 --> 00:06:38,429 I'm not being sarcastic here, 125 00:06:38,429 --> 00:06:45,569 but one option is sin. 126 00:06:45,569 --> 00:06:49,138 I mean one option is: 127 00:06:49,138 --> 00:06:53,780 I'm out of here. I'm going to go live with my boyfriend. 128 00:06:53,780 --> 00:06:57,549 And people choose that option all the time. 129 00:06:57,549 --> 00:06:58,910 I'm going to go to the bar. 130 00:06:58,910 --> 00:07:01,458 I'm going to get drunk. 131 00:07:01,458 --> 00:07:04,369 I don't know any other way to find a guy. 132 00:07:04,369 --> 00:07:08,839 That's the way it happened in the world 133 00:07:08,839 --> 00:07:11,448 and now I'm trying to be a Christian 134 00:07:11,448 --> 00:07:16,998 and I've had it. 135 00:07:16,998 --> 00:07:19,099 I'm frustrated 136 00:07:19,099 --> 00:07:22,138 and following Christ is too hard. 137 00:07:22,138 --> 00:07:23,738 Or you just make Christ out: 138 00:07:23,738 --> 00:07:25,867 Well, He'll forgive me, 139 00:07:25,867 --> 00:07:28,709 and so I'm going to go do this. 140 00:07:28,709 --> 00:07:31,397 That's an option. 141 00:07:31,397 --> 00:07:34,110 Another option. 142 00:07:34,110 --> 00:07:36,289 You can get online and you can say 143 00:07:36,289 --> 00:07:39,119 I'm going to match.com and eharmony. 144 00:07:39,119 --> 00:07:47,098 And I don't know, Christian Mingle? 145 00:07:47,098 --> 00:07:48,649 James: Sovereign Singles. 146 00:07:48,649 --> 00:07:52,168 Tim: Sovereign Grace Singles. 147 00:07:52,168 --> 00:07:53,550 People do that. 148 00:07:53,550 --> 00:07:55,408 I know Christians that have done that. 149 00:07:55,408 --> 00:07:59,408 We know a sister that was in our church that got married 150 00:07:59,408 --> 00:08:02,209 through seeking on some kind of Christian (website). 151 00:08:02,209 --> 00:08:07,539 You can do that. 152 00:08:07,539 --> 00:08:12,668 R.C. Sproul's son, different people. 153 00:08:12,668 --> 00:08:15,007 What was that one? 154 00:08:15,007 --> 00:08:16,978 (incomplete thought) 155 00:08:16,978 --> 00:08:19,528 They had a data breach. 156 00:08:19,528 --> 00:08:22,308 James: Oh, he was on an adultery website. 157 00:08:22,308 --> 00:08:24,108 Tim: Yeah, there's adultery websites. 158 00:08:24,108 --> 00:08:28,310 There's all sorts of options on the Internet 159 00:08:28,310 --> 00:08:29,571 to try to find people. 160 00:08:29,571 --> 00:08:31,008 You can parade yourself. 161 00:08:31,008 --> 00:08:35,489 You can kind of create fictitious you. 162 00:08:35,489 --> 00:08:38,638 You can put your best picture. 163 00:08:38,638 --> 00:08:40,819 And you can say all the things, 164 00:08:40,819 --> 00:08:42,138 have the light just right, 165 00:08:42,138 --> 00:08:43,348 make it all look good, 166 00:08:43,348 --> 00:08:45,518 and have nice background. 167 00:08:45,518 --> 00:08:47,859 You know, you can really stage yourself 168 00:08:47,859 --> 00:08:51,108 and portray yourself exactly how you want there. 169 00:08:51,108 --> 00:08:56,809 And lots of people do that. 170 00:08:56,809 --> 00:09:00,090 What are other options? 171 00:09:00,090 --> 00:09:05,650 (incomplete thought) 172 00:09:05,650 --> 00:09:10,938 This is a young lady. 173 00:09:10,938 --> 00:09:13,196 We heard not too long ago: 174 00:09:13,196 --> 00:09:17,816 well, didn't Ruth initiate? 175 00:09:17,816 --> 00:09:22,245 Didn't she go pursue Boaz? She did. 176 00:09:22,245 --> 00:09:25,197 So it was suggested that if you're a young lady 177 00:09:25,197 --> 00:09:26,724 and you're frustrated - 178 00:09:26,724 --> 00:09:30,555 you're frustrated waiting on the guys, 179 00:09:30,555 --> 00:09:33,006 you could take the initiative. 180 00:09:33,006 --> 00:09:37,196 And there are girls who do that - 181 00:09:37,196 --> 00:09:38,656 lost and saved. 182 00:09:38,656 --> 00:09:41,656 There are girls who do that. 183 00:09:41,656 --> 00:09:43,695 Right or wrong? 184 00:09:43,695 --> 00:09:46,305 Well, some would say Ruth 185 00:09:46,305 --> 00:09:48,147 seems to indicate that maybe 186 00:09:48,147 --> 00:09:51,866 it's not wrong all the time. 187 00:09:51,866 --> 00:09:55,486 What else? What's another option? 188 00:09:55,486 --> 00:10:00,717 You can strive to make yourself more attractive. 189 00:10:00,717 --> 00:10:03,676 That's an option. 190 00:10:03,676 --> 00:10:07,116 And maybe there's some validity. 191 00:10:07,116 --> 00:10:08,247 You say, how? 192 00:10:08,247 --> 00:10:09,767 Now listen to what I'm saying, 193 00:10:09,767 --> 00:10:13,367 making yourself more attractive - 194 00:10:13,367 --> 00:10:18,197 sometimes a carnal flavor 195 00:10:18,197 --> 00:10:19,527 tends to come out of that, 196 00:10:19,527 --> 00:10:21,828 but I'll tell you if there's a godly guy 197 00:10:21,828 --> 00:10:25,926 looking for a woman to marry, 198 00:10:25,926 --> 00:10:29,295 the things that will make her attractive to him 199 00:10:29,295 --> 00:10:32,255 are the things that a girl who wants to find a guy like that 200 00:10:32,255 --> 00:10:37,906 should be making themselves attractive in. 201 00:10:37,906 --> 00:10:39,957 What can you do? 202 00:10:39,957 --> 00:10:46,257 Let's just talk about the physical side of it. 203 00:10:46,257 --> 00:10:48,548 You know what? If you're overweight, 204 00:10:48,548 --> 00:10:50,104 is that going to have any impact 205 00:10:50,104 --> 00:10:51,688 on your ability to get married? 206 00:10:51,688 --> 00:10:53,178 Perhaps. 207 00:10:53,178 --> 00:10:55,675 And it not only speaks perhaps of physical things, 208 00:10:55,675 --> 00:11:00,255 but it speaks of very likely spiritual things. 209 00:11:00,255 --> 00:11:04,656 Maybe like a lack of self-control. 210 00:11:04,656 --> 00:11:08,899 Making yourself attractive... 211 00:11:08,899 --> 00:11:12,246 do you want to just let yourself fall apart? 212 00:11:12,246 --> 00:11:15,048 Like you're undisciplined? 213 00:11:15,048 --> 00:11:16,780 That's not good. 214 00:11:16,780 --> 00:11:18,267 Dressing - 215 00:11:18,267 --> 00:11:21,276 I'm not saying somebody should dress worldly, 216 00:11:21,276 --> 00:11:24,427 but can somebody dress in a way 217 00:11:24,427 --> 00:11:27,017 that might be more attractive? 218 00:11:27,017 --> 00:11:33,078 (Incomplete thought) 219 00:11:33,078 --> 00:11:36,966 Sometimes people talk about dressing smartly or nice. 220 00:11:36,966 --> 00:11:38,299 Not necessarily worldly, 221 00:11:38,299 --> 00:11:42,358 but looking shabby. 222 00:11:42,358 --> 00:11:44,828 Making yourself attractive. 223 00:11:44,828 --> 00:11:45,746 You know what? 224 00:11:45,746 --> 00:11:48,417 Sometimes there are women 225 00:11:48,417 --> 00:11:50,616 who are very unattractive 226 00:11:50,616 --> 00:11:55,197 because they're loud, they're proud, 227 00:11:55,197 --> 00:12:03,008 they're boastful, they're arrogant. 228 00:12:03,008 --> 00:12:06,866 Now, sometimes there are women 229 00:12:06,866 --> 00:12:08,547 who are too quiet - 230 00:12:08,547 --> 00:12:10,539 on the opposite end. 231 00:12:10,539 --> 00:12:12,035 They never talk to a guy. 232 00:12:12,035 --> 00:12:14,776 They shy away. 233 00:12:14,776 --> 00:12:17,356 Maybe you can put yourself in a position 234 00:12:17,356 --> 00:12:23,647 where you're actually rubbing shoulders 235 00:12:23,647 --> 00:12:30,059 with those of the opposite sex. 236 00:12:30,059 --> 00:12:35,168 Let's hold the questions till the end. 237 00:12:35,168 --> 00:12:42,777 Maybe just letting there be something mysterious about you. 238 00:12:42,777 --> 00:12:44,617 I mean, I've known some young ladies 239 00:12:44,617 --> 00:12:47,875 that are telling a guy like the second time they meet or something 240 00:12:47,875 --> 00:12:51,417 they love them and there's nothing very mysterious. 241 00:12:51,417 --> 00:12:54,965 There's not much of a challenge. 242 00:12:54,965 --> 00:12:57,168 I'm just saying, these are things 243 00:12:57,168 --> 00:13:00,547 that you can do. 244 00:13:00,547 --> 00:13:02,215 A young lady can put herself 245 00:13:02,215 --> 00:13:04,956 where young men are. 246 00:13:04,956 --> 00:13:07,154 And again, I'm not telling you 247 00:13:07,154 --> 00:13:09,176 whether these things are right or wrong. 248 00:13:09,176 --> 00:13:11,757 I'm telling you these are options 249 00:13:11,757 --> 00:13:18,988 that people have at their disposal. 250 00:13:18,988 --> 00:13:27,686 You can seek to stir up some interest. 251 00:13:27,686 --> 00:13:32,327 Here's something not to do: 252 00:13:32,327 --> 00:13:35,727 Here's an option that probably is wise. 253 00:13:35,727 --> 00:13:39,726 We were at the Pearl on Sunday night 254 00:13:39,726 --> 00:13:43,716 and Mack was speaking to a good crowd of us 255 00:13:43,716 --> 00:13:45,423 and somebody asked him 256 00:13:45,423 --> 00:13:47,236 about his marriage. 257 00:13:47,236 --> 00:13:49,047 And he was actually talking about it 258 00:13:49,047 --> 00:13:50,487 and being very transparent 259 00:13:50,487 --> 00:13:51,813 about some of his struggles 260 00:13:51,813 --> 00:13:53,605 and his communication issues 261 00:13:53,605 --> 00:13:55,185 that he's had to overcome, 262 00:13:55,185 --> 00:13:56,620 and he told us a story 263 00:13:56,620 --> 00:13:58,547 about this last New Year's, 264 00:13:58,547 --> 00:14:02,646 and said it was 9:55 265 00:14:02,646 --> 00:14:05,185 and his wife asked him to stay up 266 00:14:05,185 --> 00:14:06,355 for the New Year, 267 00:14:06,355 --> 00:14:08,007 and he said I go to bed at 10, 268 00:14:08,007 --> 00:14:10,197 and he said my eyes were hanging low, 269 00:14:10,197 --> 00:14:15,926 and she put on a Hallmark movie. 270 00:14:15,926 --> 00:14:18,486 And he said it was 13 degrees outside 271 00:14:18,486 --> 00:14:20,547 and he went outside and stood out there 272 00:14:20,547 --> 00:14:22,066 until he was wide awake. 273 00:14:22,066 --> 00:14:24,996 And he came in and he watched two or three 274 00:14:24,996 --> 00:14:26,527 Hallmark movies with his wife. 275 00:14:26,527 --> 00:14:27,601 Missed the New Year 276 00:14:27,601 --> 00:14:30,166 because they were all into the movie. 277 00:14:30,166 --> 00:14:34,727 He said it was wonderful. 278 00:14:34,727 --> 00:14:36,315 Now that might be good for a man 279 00:14:36,315 --> 00:14:38,285 who's trying to strengthen his marriage. 280 00:14:38,285 --> 00:14:40,017 That is not good for a young lady 281 00:14:40,017 --> 00:14:42,225 who is single to sit and watch 282 00:14:42,225 --> 00:14:43,686 two or three of those. 283 00:14:43,686 --> 00:14:47,316 She ought to stay as far away from those as possible. 284 00:14:47,316 --> 00:14:51,795 Why? Why expose yourself to that? 285 00:14:51,795 --> 00:14:53,935 Why do that? 286 00:14:53,935 --> 00:14:56,767 What else? 287 00:14:56,767 --> 00:15:00,797 James: What's a Hallmark movie? 288 00:15:00,797 --> 00:15:06,625 Tim: It's a romance movie. 289 00:15:06,625 --> 00:15:10,595 James: Our wives obviously watch them all this time. 290 00:15:10,595 --> 00:15:12,667 Tim: I've watched some with my wife. 291 00:15:12,667 --> 00:15:16,166 They all have the same storyline, 292 00:15:16,166 --> 00:15:18,226 just different actors and actresses. 293 00:15:18,226 --> 00:15:23,987 They are identical - every one of them. 294 00:15:23,987 --> 00:15:26,977 They're the kind of movies guys hate. 295 00:15:26,977 --> 00:15:33,384 But if you watch them with your wife... 296 00:15:33,384 --> 00:15:35,487 She's actually asking about 297 00:15:35,487 --> 00:15:37,757 whether the church should be involved. 298 00:15:37,757 --> 00:15:39,987 Now that's an option. 299 00:15:39,987 --> 00:15:42,516 Could you look to your father 300 00:15:42,516 --> 00:15:44,405 to help set you up with somebody? 301 00:15:44,405 --> 00:15:46,586 Could you look to your pastor? 302 00:15:46,586 --> 00:15:48,086 I'll admit some people 303 00:15:48,086 --> 00:15:50,664 are better matchmakers than others. 304 00:15:50,664 --> 00:15:54,547 But that's a possibility and that happens. 305 00:15:54,547 --> 00:15:56,996 There's communication and I have it. 306 00:15:56,996 --> 00:15:58,737 Very likely, James has it. 307 00:15:58,737 --> 00:16:01,185 There's communication with elders 308 00:16:01,185 --> 00:16:03,488 in other churches at times 309 00:16:03,488 --> 00:16:05,486 about singles in the church 310 00:16:05,486 --> 00:16:11,774 and possible matches. 311 00:16:11,774 --> 00:16:23,746 Here's an option. 312 00:16:23,746 --> 00:16:40,036 This is a serious option. 313 00:16:40,036 --> 00:16:44,097 Surrendering yourself 314 00:16:44,097 --> 00:16:48,568 to living a life of singleness 315 00:16:48,568 --> 00:16:53,706 to the glory of God if that's what God has called you to. 316 00:16:53,706 --> 00:16:57,605 You say, well, here I am struggling. 317 00:16:57,605 --> 00:17:00,926 I'm struggling with singleness 318 00:17:00,926 --> 00:17:03,378 and you're going to give me that as an option? 319 00:17:03,378 --> 00:17:08,076 Yeah, I think that's a tremendous option. 320 00:17:08,076 --> 00:17:10,777 Let me say it again. 321 00:17:10,777 --> 00:17:13,417 Surrendering. 322 00:17:13,417 --> 00:17:23,077 (incomplete thought) 323 00:17:23,077 --> 00:17:26,087 But just surrendering yourself 324 00:17:26,087 --> 00:17:35,665 to that reality. 325 00:17:35,665 --> 00:17:39,118 You know what, when I was single, 326 00:17:39,118 --> 00:17:42,776 I asked the Lord: 327 00:17:42,776 --> 00:17:46,187 Lord, I'll stay single. 328 00:17:46,187 --> 00:17:48,976 I don't have any problem staying single 329 00:17:48,976 --> 00:17:52,537 if You'll help me be single. 330 00:17:52,537 --> 00:17:54,885 I mean, if You'll grant me a gift of singleness 331 00:17:54,885 --> 00:17:57,027 and grant me contentment to be single, 332 00:17:57,027 --> 00:18:00,147 I'll happily stay single. 333 00:18:00,147 --> 00:18:03,276 But I think that's a real, genuine option 334 00:18:03,276 --> 00:18:07,857 is to say: Lord, I'm surrendered. 335 00:18:07,857 --> 00:18:08,736 I'm surrendered. 336 00:18:08,736 --> 00:18:10,567 I am not going to live my life 337 00:18:10,567 --> 00:18:13,666 like life doesn't start till I'm married. 338 00:18:13,666 --> 00:18:16,777 I'm surrendering that to You. 339 00:18:16,777 --> 00:18:18,026 Lord, here I am. 340 00:18:18,026 --> 00:18:19,367 I'm ready to serve You 341 00:18:19,367 --> 00:18:21,317 and if You want me to serve You single, 342 00:18:21,317 --> 00:18:22,967 then I'm going to serve You single 343 00:18:22,967 --> 00:18:26,486 as best as I can. 344 00:18:26,486 --> 00:18:28,066 I think that is an option 345 00:18:28,066 --> 00:18:32,726 that you really want to consider. 346 00:18:32,726 --> 00:18:35,186 This is one to think about. 347 00:18:35,186 --> 00:18:36,806 I've given lots of options. 348 00:18:36,806 --> 00:18:38,516 Make yourself more attractive. 349 00:18:38,516 --> 00:18:40,116 Get on the Internet 350 00:18:40,116 --> 00:18:42,707 and use one of these match-making deals. 351 00:18:42,707 --> 00:18:44,386 There's all sorts of things. 352 00:18:44,386 --> 00:18:47,677 Talk to the pastor. Talk to other people. 353 00:18:47,677 --> 00:18:51,086 Go to where the guys are. 354 00:18:51,086 --> 00:18:53,136 Communicate some. 355 00:18:53,136 --> 00:18:55,355 Fix the things that are wrong. 356 00:18:55,355 --> 00:18:57,238 Make yourself more attractive. 357 00:18:57,238 --> 00:18:59,127 There's all these things 358 00:18:59,127 --> 00:19:01,532 that you can think about. 359 00:19:01,532 --> 00:19:04,495 Girls taking initiative. 360 00:19:04,495 --> 00:19:08,298 But I'll tell you what Scripture says. 361 00:19:08,298 --> 00:19:10,608 Not so much about getting a husband 362 00:19:10,608 --> 00:19:11,768 or a wife, 363 00:19:11,768 --> 00:19:14,604 but I think you can put it in there. 364 00:19:14,604 --> 00:19:18,147 Because what Jesus is talking about 365 00:19:18,147 --> 00:19:21,493 is food and clothing. 366 00:19:21,493 --> 00:19:23,298 The basics of life. 367 00:19:23,298 --> 00:19:24,937 And you know what He says? 368 00:19:24,937 --> 00:19:29,347 Seek first the Kingdom of Heaven 369 00:19:29,347 --> 00:19:35,786 and all these things shall be added unto you. 370 00:19:35,786 --> 00:19:37,857 You know what one option is? 371 00:19:37,857 --> 00:19:41,287 Just all out serve the Lord. 372 00:19:41,287 --> 00:19:44,187 (incomplete thought) 373 00:19:44,187 --> 00:19:47,357 Listen, we have a God 374 00:19:47,357 --> 00:19:48,846 that if He wants you married, 375 00:19:48,846 --> 00:19:50,578 you can be on a desert island 376 00:19:50,578 --> 00:19:52,706 where there's not a guy 1,000 miles from you 377 00:19:52,706 --> 00:19:54,146 and He will get that guy there 378 00:19:54,146 --> 00:19:56,657 and you will be married. 379 00:19:56,657 --> 00:19:58,877 James: Or you can be in India 380 00:19:58,877 --> 00:20:00,666 and some guy from Bangladesh 381 00:20:00,666 --> 00:20:02,534 ends up over there and you marry him. 382 00:20:02,534 --> 00:20:03,824 Tim: Right. 383 00:20:03,824 --> 00:20:09,447 I mean, when Ruby - she was in a church, 384 00:20:09,447 --> 00:20:12,084 no single guys. 385 00:20:12,084 --> 00:20:14,643 I'm looking at moving to a different church 386 00:20:14,643 --> 00:20:15,834 in the same city. 387 00:20:15,834 --> 00:20:19,775 John Sytsma called me and told me: 388 00:20:19,775 --> 00:20:20,945 we know you're single 389 00:20:20,945 --> 00:20:25,245 and Pat just wanted John to say to me, 390 00:20:25,245 --> 00:20:29,996 look, there aren't any eligible young ladies here. 391 00:20:29,996 --> 00:20:32,585 It was like that didn't even cross my mind. 392 00:20:32,585 --> 00:20:33,806 I'm not going down there 393 00:20:33,806 --> 00:20:36,554 because there's a bunch of single ladies. 394 00:20:36,554 --> 00:20:37,696 I'm going down there 395 00:20:37,696 --> 00:20:40,374 because that's the kind of church I've been looking for. 396 00:20:40,374 --> 00:20:41,736 Ruby's dad would say to her 397 00:20:41,736 --> 00:20:43,557 even if God has to bring your husband 398 00:20:43,557 --> 00:20:44,914 from 1,000 miles away - 399 00:20:44,914 --> 00:20:46,946 well, that's exactly what happened. 400 00:20:46,946 --> 00:20:52,162 The thing is seek first the Kingdom. 401 00:20:52,162 --> 00:20:56,885 (incomplete thought) 402 00:20:56,885 --> 00:20:59,568 Yes, pray. That came up before. 403 00:20:59,568 --> 00:21:01,104 And don't underestimate that. 404 00:21:01,104 --> 00:21:02,565 I'm not putting these options 405 00:21:02,565 --> 00:21:04,386 in order of priority. 406 00:21:04,386 --> 00:21:07,326 In fact, I'm probably putting them worst to best. 407 00:21:07,326 --> 00:21:10,795 But the thing is don't underestimate 408 00:21:10,795 --> 00:21:13,375 the God that Christians have. 409 00:21:13,375 --> 00:21:15,094 We have us a God who's able to do 410 00:21:15,094 --> 00:21:16,467 exceedingly, abundantly, 411 00:21:16,467 --> 00:21:18,345 beyond what you ask or think. 412 00:21:18,345 --> 00:21:21,305 (incomplete thought) 413 00:21:21,305 --> 00:21:23,195 This is a huge thing. 414 00:21:23,195 --> 00:21:25,735 You know what one of the good options is? 415 00:21:25,735 --> 00:21:29,403 Is renew your minds. 416 00:21:29,403 --> 00:21:30,871 Renew your minds. 417 00:21:30,871 --> 00:21:33,624 You say what do you mean? 418 00:21:33,624 --> 00:21:35,045 I mean this: 419 00:21:35,045 --> 00:21:36,214 you can be single 420 00:21:36,214 --> 00:21:37,696 and you can be in a situation 421 00:21:37,696 --> 00:21:39,604 where you see all these married people 422 00:21:39,604 --> 00:21:41,614 and you say: woe is me. 423 00:21:41,614 --> 00:21:43,205 Okay, let me ask you something. 424 00:21:43,205 --> 00:21:45,134 Are you a Christian? 425 00:21:45,134 --> 00:21:47,604 Yes. 426 00:21:47,604 --> 00:21:50,204 Woe is me? 427 00:21:50,204 --> 00:21:52,045 You've been saved from your sins. 428 00:21:52,045 --> 00:21:54,815 In a very short time, you're going to be in Paradise. 429 00:21:54,815 --> 00:21:57,114 This life is fleeting. 430 00:21:57,114 --> 00:21:58,725 It's over in a moment. 431 00:21:58,725 --> 00:22:03,336 It's like a breath of fog and it's gone. 432 00:22:03,336 --> 00:22:05,674 You are going to spend forever - 433 00:22:05,674 --> 00:22:09,765 eternal life, abundant, overflowing, 434 00:22:09,765 --> 00:22:11,375 an eternal weight of glory, 435 00:22:11,375 --> 00:22:13,146 and you're saying woe is me? 436 00:22:13,146 --> 00:22:15,065 Wake up! 437 00:22:15,065 --> 00:22:16,524 It is not woe is you. 438 00:22:16,524 --> 00:22:18,275 In fact, the Apostle Paul said 439 00:22:18,275 --> 00:22:19,595 that if you're married, 440 00:22:19,595 --> 00:22:22,636 you're going to be taken up with worldly anxieties. 441 00:22:22,636 --> 00:22:23,984 But if you're not married, 442 00:22:23,984 --> 00:22:27,076 you can give yourself freely and fully to the Lord. 443 00:22:27,076 --> 00:22:28,905 What does that mean? Renew your mind. 444 00:22:28,905 --> 00:22:30,312 It means on judgment day 445 00:22:30,312 --> 00:22:32,446 when sister so-and-so over here 446 00:22:32,446 --> 00:22:34,716 is being rewarded for the 60% 447 00:22:34,716 --> 00:22:36,716 she was able to bring forth in her life 448 00:22:36,716 --> 00:22:39,315 because 40% was given to worldly endeavors 449 00:22:39,315 --> 00:22:41,046 that really didn't amount to much, 450 00:22:41,046 --> 00:22:43,055 and you're over here and you were single 451 00:22:43,055 --> 00:22:45,325 and you could have devoted your whole life - 452 00:22:45,325 --> 00:22:47,005 you want to be that person that: 453 00:22:47,005 --> 00:22:49,723 "Oh, well done! A hundred fold!" 454 00:22:49,723 --> 00:22:51,214 You don't want to be tenfold 455 00:22:51,214 --> 00:22:53,725 because 90% of the time, you pined away, 456 00:22:53,725 --> 00:22:56,704 self pity, oh "woe is me." 457 00:22:56,704 --> 00:22:58,544 Listen, renew your mind. 458 00:22:58,544 --> 00:23:00,535 The thing is you're not the only person 459 00:23:00,535 --> 00:23:01,845 suffering in this world. 460 00:23:01,845 --> 00:23:03,616 And there are many married people 461 00:23:03,616 --> 00:23:06,505 who are just as lonely or lonelier than you. 462 00:23:06,505 --> 00:23:08,306 And there are people that are married 463 00:23:08,306 --> 00:23:09,493 that are very miserable. 464 00:23:09,493 --> 00:23:11,646 And I guarantee you this, 465 00:23:11,646 --> 00:23:15,775 that look, we have us a God, 466 00:23:15,775 --> 00:23:17,904 and I think there's a place to come to Him 467 00:23:17,904 --> 00:23:22,077 and pray, Lord, I ask You, please, 468 00:23:22,077 --> 00:23:23,795 give me a spouse 469 00:23:23,795 --> 00:23:26,835 or give me the grace to be single. 470 00:23:26,835 --> 00:23:28,092 That's very reasonable. 471 00:23:28,092 --> 00:23:30,324 Why would He not give you either one of those? 472 00:23:30,324 --> 00:23:31,516 He will! 473 00:23:31,516 --> 00:23:33,484 When we're suffering and you're like Paul 474 00:23:33,484 --> 00:23:35,980 and you come and say I've got a thorn in the flesh 475 00:23:35,980 --> 00:23:38,864 and would You please take it away, and you ask three times, 476 00:23:38,864 --> 00:23:40,995 what's the answer? "My grace is sufficient." 477 00:23:40,995 --> 00:23:43,754 And I think that's where our expectation needs to be. 478 00:23:43,754 --> 00:23:45,414 And you need to renew your mind. 479 00:23:45,414 --> 00:23:48,574 You need to think right about things. 480 00:23:48,574 --> 00:23:50,214 Think right. 481 00:23:50,214 --> 00:23:52,005 The Apostle Paul teaches 482 00:23:52,005 --> 00:23:54,244 that if you're single, you have the ability 483 00:23:54,244 --> 00:23:57,455 to serve the Lord like married people don't. 484 00:23:57,455 --> 00:24:00,886 Don't waste your singleness. 485 00:24:00,886 --> 00:24:03,912 Don't waste it pining away, 486 00:24:03,912 --> 00:24:08,963 feeling like you have an entitlement 487 00:24:08,963 --> 00:24:10,384 to be married 488 00:24:10,384 --> 00:24:12,814 and somehow God has done you wrong 489 00:24:12,814 --> 00:24:15,856 until you get a spouse. 490 00:24:15,856 --> 00:24:19,164 Don't think you're the only one that suffers. 491 00:24:19,164 --> 00:24:23,014 We can think like that. 492 00:24:23,014 --> 00:24:25,176 We often think that way in our suffering. 493 00:24:25,176 --> 00:24:27,686 But remember, we have a sympathetic high priest. 494 00:24:27,686 --> 00:24:28,975 That's what Scripture says. 495 00:24:28,975 --> 00:24:32,685 And He's able to relate. 496 00:24:32,685 --> 00:24:34,734 He stayed single His whole life. 497 00:24:34,734 --> 00:24:37,355 He was a Man of Sorrows. 498 00:24:37,355 --> 00:24:38,847 Charles Leiter's done a message 499 00:24:38,847 --> 00:24:40,277 on the loneliness of Christ. 500 00:24:40,277 --> 00:24:43,105 If ever somebody was lonely, it was Christ. 501 00:24:43,105 --> 00:24:46,848 He suffered alone on that cross. 502 00:24:46,848 --> 00:24:50,365 And here's the thing, 503 00:24:50,365 --> 00:24:52,276 our lives really are momentary. 504 00:24:52,276 --> 00:24:53,985 You need to renew your mind there. 505 00:24:53,985 --> 00:24:54,953 And you know what? 506 00:24:54,953 --> 00:24:56,465 Even the people in this room 507 00:24:56,465 --> 00:24:59,173 with the happiest marriages - 508 00:24:59,173 --> 00:25:01,143 one of us is going to die 509 00:25:01,143 --> 00:25:05,243 and probably not both of us on the same day. 510 00:25:05,243 --> 00:25:08,294 Somebody's going to say goodbye. 511 00:25:08,294 --> 00:25:10,277 And it's over. 512 00:25:10,277 --> 00:25:11,813 John Piper wrote a book called, 513 00:25:11,813 --> 00:25:14,093 "This Momentary Marriage." 514 00:25:14,093 --> 00:25:16,343 It's just momentary. 515 00:25:16,343 --> 00:25:18,263 And then there's eternity forever. 516 00:25:18,263 --> 00:25:20,303 And I guarantee you, in a million years 517 00:25:20,303 --> 00:25:22,631 it will not matter which ones of us were married 518 00:25:22,631 --> 00:25:24,394 or which ones of us weren't married. 519 00:25:24,394 --> 00:25:25,926 What's going to really matter is 520 00:25:25,926 --> 00:25:27,274 whether you were in or out; 521 00:25:27,274 --> 00:25:28,522 whether you served well; 522 00:25:28,522 --> 00:25:29,892 whether in the end, it's: 523 00:25:29,892 --> 00:25:40,023 Well done, good and faithful servant. 524 00:25:40,023 --> 00:25:41,702 You had your hand up. 525 00:25:41,702 --> 00:25:42,763 (from the room) 526 00:25:42,763 --> 00:25:45,343 Yeah, I noticed you were talking 527 00:25:45,343 --> 00:25:47,446 from the perspective of the female, 528 00:25:47,446 --> 00:25:49,113 but I wanted to ask you 529 00:25:49,113 --> 00:25:50,354 could you elaborate - 530 00:25:50,354 --> 00:25:51,785 I heard a lot of talk 531 00:25:51,785 --> 00:25:54,053 about the gift of singleness. 532 00:25:54,053 --> 00:25:57,372 Can you tell us like what you think that is? 533 00:25:57,372 --> 00:25:59,043 Tim: Well, it seems to be a gift 534 00:25:59,043 --> 00:26:00,655 and it seems to be something 535 00:26:00,655 --> 00:26:01,874 that some people have 536 00:26:01,874 --> 00:26:03,944 that other people don't have. 537 00:26:03,944 --> 00:26:10,436 And what is the gift? 538 00:26:10,436 --> 00:26:15,003 I would say it's a lack of need to be married. 539 00:26:15,003 --> 00:26:17,904 It's the ability to be content 540 00:26:17,904 --> 00:26:21,833 to stay single. 541 00:26:21,833 --> 00:26:24,424 I want to read something to you. 542 00:26:24,424 --> 00:26:27,013 I often go back to this. 543 00:26:27,013 --> 00:26:29,913 This is "Praying Payson" - Edward Payson 544 00:26:29,913 --> 00:26:31,754 of Portland, Maine. 545 00:26:31,754 --> 00:26:33,224 James: What page is that? 546 00:26:33,224 --> 00:26:39,033 Tim: This is page 410 of Volume 1. 547 00:26:39,033 --> 00:26:41,806 He is dying. 548 00:26:41,806 --> 00:26:44,194 Listen to what he says. 549 00:26:44,194 --> 00:26:48,756 "Christians might avoid much trouble 550 00:26:48,756 --> 00:26:50,624 and inconvenience 551 00:26:50,624 --> 00:26:52,243 if they would only believe 552 00:26:52,243 --> 00:26:54,402 what they profess, 553 00:26:54,402 --> 00:26:58,522 that God is able to make them happy 554 00:26:58,522 --> 00:27:02,604 without anything else." 555 00:27:02,604 --> 00:27:07,705 Seek first the Kingdom of God. 556 00:27:07,705 --> 00:27:15,672 Seek first God. 557 00:27:15,672 --> 00:27:18,744 Single people - I can tell you this, 558 00:27:18,744 --> 00:27:20,265 in my singleness, 559 00:27:20,265 --> 00:27:21,646 did I want to be married? 560 00:27:21,646 --> 00:27:23,554 Yes, I wanted to be married. 561 00:27:23,554 --> 00:27:25,204 But I can tell you this, 562 00:27:25,204 --> 00:27:28,266 I had visitations of the presence of Christ 563 00:27:28,266 --> 00:27:30,313 in those three years of singleness 564 00:27:30,313 --> 00:27:35,032 that I have not had since I've been married. 565 00:27:35,032 --> 00:27:39,230 They are the most fulfilling things imaginable. 566 00:27:39,230 --> 00:27:42,894 Listen to what Payson says. 567 00:27:42,894 --> 00:27:46,774 "Christians imagine that if such a dear friend were to die..." 568 00:27:46,774 --> 00:27:48,394 or I'll insert here: 569 00:27:48,394 --> 00:27:51,455 or if I wasn't to get married, 570 00:27:51,455 --> 00:27:52,854 and it's like my spouse died 571 00:27:52,854 --> 00:27:55,374 before I ever met him - 572 00:27:55,374 --> 00:27:58,584 "or such and such blessings to be removed" 573 00:27:58,584 --> 00:28:02,043 (like the blessing of marriage), 574 00:28:02,043 --> 00:28:05,733 "they imagine that they should be miserable." 575 00:28:05,733 --> 00:28:07,183 And that's what happens. 576 00:28:07,183 --> 00:28:09,164 Oh, woe is me. I'm going to be miserable. 577 00:28:09,164 --> 00:28:11,443 I'm not going to get married. 578 00:28:11,443 --> 00:28:13,403 But he says this, "Whereas God 579 00:28:13,403 --> 00:28:17,283 can make them a thousand times happier 580 00:28:17,283 --> 00:28:19,073 without them. 581 00:28:19,073 --> 00:28:20,452 To mention my own case, 582 00:28:20,452 --> 00:28:22,392 God has been depriving me 583 00:28:22,392 --> 00:28:24,435 of one blessing after another, 584 00:28:24,435 --> 00:28:28,014 but as every one of these blessings 585 00:28:28,014 --> 00:28:29,643 has been removed, 586 00:28:29,643 --> 00:28:33,014 God has come in and filled up its place 587 00:28:33,014 --> 00:28:35,302 and now when I'm a cripple, 588 00:28:35,302 --> 00:28:36,702 not able to move, 589 00:28:36,702 --> 00:28:39,785 I am happier than ever I was in my life 590 00:28:39,785 --> 00:28:42,893 before or ever expected to be. 591 00:28:42,893 --> 00:28:46,912 And if I had only believed this 20 years ago, 592 00:28:46,912 --> 00:28:51,793 I might have been spared much anxiety." 593 00:28:51,793 --> 00:28:55,195 The truth is God alone 594 00:28:55,195 --> 00:28:56,483 without anything else 595 00:28:56,483 --> 00:28:58,464 is entirely satisfying. 596 00:28:58,464 --> 00:29:00,493 Renew your mind. 597 00:29:00,493 --> 00:29:03,365 Renew your mind. 598 00:29:03,365 --> 00:29:10,054 To find God is it. 599 00:29:10,054 --> 00:29:14,854 That's the sum. 600 00:29:14,854 --> 00:29:22,033 A good option is to abandon 601 00:29:22,033 --> 00:29:24,854 marriage idolatry. 602 00:29:24,854 --> 00:29:27,323 Marriage is not God. 603 00:29:27,323 --> 00:29:29,495 A husband is not God. 604 00:29:29,495 --> 00:29:31,454 A wife is not God. 605 00:29:31,454 --> 00:29:32,872 Not even close. 606 00:29:32,872 --> 00:29:34,744 Not even to be equated. 607 00:29:34,744 --> 00:29:37,164 And if you're living just for marriage, 608 00:29:37,164 --> 00:29:39,613 you want to be careful 609 00:29:39,613 --> 00:29:41,325 because idolaters do not inherit 610 00:29:41,325 --> 00:29:44,526 the Kingdom of Heaven. 611 00:29:44,526 --> 00:29:46,035 Live for God. 612 00:29:46,035 --> 00:29:47,696 Renew the mind. 613 00:29:47,696 --> 00:29:48,863 Renew the mind. 614 00:29:48,863 --> 00:29:51,814 Become convinced of really what is important 615 00:29:51,814 --> 00:29:55,354 and what satisfies. 616 00:29:55,354 --> 00:30:00,103 Here's a man - a godly man - at the end, 617 00:30:00,103 --> 00:30:05,016 and he's realizing just how fulfilling God is 618 00:30:05,016 --> 00:30:07,696 (incomplete thought). 619 00:30:07,696 --> 00:30:09,895 What we have is his words. 620 00:30:09,895 --> 00:30:14,851 What he's saying is true. 621 00:30:14,851 --> 00:30:21,374 God is entirely fulfilling. 622 00:30:21,374 --> 00:30:25,278 And when we can get where my soul 623 00:30:25,278 --> 00:30:31,796 pants after God, 624 00:30:31,796 --> 00:30:37,066 like the deer pants after the waterbrooks, 625 00:30:37,066 --> 00:30:42,322 my soul longs, it pants after You. 626 00:30:42,322 --> 00:30:47,761 When we live that way, 627 00:30:47,761 --> 00:30:49,139 when you find God 628 00:30:49,139 --> 00:30:56,841 and you drink richly from those springs, 629 00:30:56,841 --> 00:30:59,631 you can be single. 630 00:30:59,631 --> 00:31:00,911 You can be in the fires. 631 00:31:00,911 --> 00:31:04,420 You can be in prison. 632 00:31:04,420 --> 00:31:07,671 I mean, one of those Covenanters - 633 00:31:07,671 --> 00:31:09,130 I wish I could remember, 634 00:31:09,130 --> 00:31:11,740 his name is just barely escaping me. 635 00:31:11,740 --> 00:31:14,860 It's like Cameron. Cameron, I think. 636 00:31:14,860 --> 00:31:22,061 But he was one of those Scotch Covenanters. 637 00:31:22,061 --> 00:31:26,642 They said he received like six or seven mortal wounds - 638 00:31:26,642 --> 00:31:28,979 any one of which would have killed him. 639 00:31:28,979 --> 00:31:30,292 But he was hacked up. 640 00:31:30,292 --> 00:31:32,720 They chopped him up with swords. 641 00:31:32,720 --> 00:31:35,680 They threw him - he's dying, bleeding - 642 00:31:35,680 --> 00:31:37,449 they threw him in the dungeon 643 00:31:37,449 --> 00:31:42,390 and they just piled chains on top of him. 644 00:31:42,390 --> 00:31:48,888 And his fellow comrades were in the dungeon with him. 645 00:31:48,888 --> 00:31:51,410 He's just laying there a broken man, 646 00:31:51,410 --> 00:31:53,090 his body's all shattered. 647 00:31:53,090 --> 00:31:56,370 And he was able to communicate to them 648 00:31:56,370 --> 00:32:02,700 and said I don't think I can bear up under this much longer. 649 00:32:02,700 --> 00:32:04,020 And when they inquired, 650 00:32:04,020 --> 00:32:05,520 they found out what he meant 651 00:32:05,520 --> 00:32:10,619 was not: the tortures of all these wounds 652 00:32:10,619 --> 00:32:13,579 and chains are killing me. 653 00:32:13,579 --> 00:32:15,599 He said, "I am experiencing 654 00:32:15,599 --> 00:32:18,451 the glory of God to the degree 655 00:32:18,451 --> 00:32:23,269 that I don't know if I can sustain it much longer." 656 00:32:23,269 --> 00:32:24,930 He did die. 657 00:32:24,930 --> 00:32:27,559 But the glory of God being revealed to Him - 658 00:32:27,559 --> 00:32:29,069 if we will pant after that 659 00:32:29,069 --> 00:32:30,599 and chase after that 660 00:32:30,599 --> 00:32:33,109 and not be content until we have that, 661 00:32:33,109 --> 00:32:35,467 I guarantee to find God 662 00:32:35,467 --> 00:32:39,739 and to drink of that cup, 663 00:32:39,739 --> 00:32:44,321 that so surpasses anything marriage can bring. 664 00:32:44,321 --> 00:32:49,550 And if a person has their eyes 665 00:32:49,550 --> 00:32:51,541 set on marraige and finding a husband 666 00:32:51,541 --> 00:32:55,871 and they're so full of anxieties 667 00:32:55,871 --> 00:32:59,280 and so full of discontentment, 668 00:32:59,280 --> 00:33:01,779 they're exalting marriage to something 669 00:33:01,779 --> 00:33:05,499 that they should not exalt it to. 670 00:33:05,499 --> 00:33:08,798 That's dangerous idolatry. 671 00:33:08,798 --> 00:33:10,189 But we need to be convinced. 672 00:33:10,189 --> 00:33:14,691 We need to have our minds renewed. 673 00:33:14,691 --> 00:33:16,430 Well, may the Lord help you 674 00:33:16,430 --> 00:33:19,448 to sort through the options. 675 00:33:19,448 --> 00:33:21,270 See the good ones. 676 00:33:21,270 --> 00:33:22,467 Reject the bad ones. 677 00:33:22,467 --> 00:33:27,700 Embrace the good ones. 678 00:33:27,700 --> 00:33:30,061 Father, I pray for the singles 679 00:33:30,061 --> 00:33:32,528 and I pray Lord, 680 00:33:32,528 --> 00:33:33,719 may they hear this. 681 00:33:33,719 --> 00:33:35,407 May they really hear this 682 00:33:35,407 --> 00:33:38,018 and long after You and find You, 683 00:33:38,018 --> 00:33:41,619 pursue You, 684 00:33:41,619 --> 00:33:43,948 as that deer pursues those waters 685 00:33:43,948 --> 00:33:49,420 when famished and thirsty and panting. 686 00:33:49,420 --> 00:33:52,379 Lord, we all want that - married or single. 687 00:33:52,379 --> 00:33:56,361 Give us a greater thirst for You. 688 00:33:56,361 --> 00:33:58,048 And we would take this opportunity 689 00:33:58,048 --> 00:34:03,272 to pray too for the Spirit of God. 690 00:34:03,272 --> 00:34:06,252 My daughter's birthday is in two days. 691 00:34:06,252 --> 00:34:08,910 I can think about giving her gifts. 692 00:34:08,910 --> 00:34:13,849 Oh Father, if we were the sort of Father that You are, 693 00:34:13,849 --> 00:34:15,579 knowing what we know about ourselves 694 00:34:15,579 --> 00:34:18,169 and our desire to give good gifts to our children, 695 00:34:18,169 --> 00:34:20,150 Lord, how much more will You give 696 00:34:20,150 --> 00:34:22,361 the Holy Spirit and we ask You to do it. 697 00:34:22,361 --> 00:34:24,919 Give the Holy Spirit to us. 698 00:34:24,919 --> 00:34:27,178 We ask in Christ's name, Amen.